The Accidental Leader

I was at a gathering of the authors of 'Power of Women United' recently, when our host who brought us all together called herself an 'accidental leader'. My immediate reaction was 'no your are not'! There no accident here... You see, Shirley (Chapter 20) had a vision – the vision was to bring everyone together to celebrate our book reaching the Canadian Best Sellers list. Shirley has another vision – to be on the Oprah Winfrey Show with all of the authors of the book in attendance. This girl thinks big!

We have talked about this goal since the before the book was published, and I bet some of us thought privately that it was noble, but perhaps unattainable dream – not Shirley!

We are a collection of 22 women authors - all with dreams and ambitions – all pursuing our own paths – but with a single vision, to share our stories – to help empower women in every corner of the globe. We want for others what our wisdom and experience have taught us – to be brave in the face of adversity, to get up when you fall, to act every day like the success you dream to be.

So, what about this 'accidental leader'? In my opinion there is no such thing. There are many theories about what constitutes a leader – some say you need Charisma – I say bunk! Some say you are born to it – also bunk! Leadership like any other skill is a learned behaviour. Every time you step up to something, every time you take responsibility for your own actions - you are being a leader. Being a mother is being a leader – you show your children by example how to behave in the world. Leadership is not just for people in politics or corporations.

Where does Leadership begin? It's an inside job! it begins with taking responsibility for every word and action - it begins with having a deep regard and respect for your fellow human beings – and it begins with guts to face up to a challenge and take it on. Leadership is also about taking risks – doing what others will not do – that can feel scary sometimes, but the payoff can be huge.

Does a leader need followers? No – a leader needs a vision a purpose and a plan – and the commitment to help others see where she is headed. I stand side by side – arm in arm with this 'Accidental Leader' on our journey to empower all women no matter where they are or what their circumstance. Won't you join us on this journey? See you in Chicago! Oprah - here we come!

When I am an Old Woman... by Jenny Joseph

Warning - by Jenny Joseph

When I am an old woman, I shall wear purple

With a red hat which doesn't go, and doesn't suit me.

And I shall spend my pension on brandy and summer gloves

And satin sandals, and say we've no money for butter.

I shall sit down on the pavement when I'm tired

And gobble up samples in shops and press alarm bells

And run my stick along the public railings

And make up for the sobriety of my youth.

I shall go out in my slippers in the rain

And pick the flowers in other peoples' gardens

And learn to spit.

You can wear terrible shirts and grow more fat

And eat three pounds of sausages at a go

Or only bread and pickles for a week

And hoard pens and pencils and beermats and things in boxes.

But now we must have clothes that keep us dry

And pay our rent and not swear in the street

And set a good example for the children.

We must have friends to dinner and read the papers.

But maybe I ought to practise a little now?

So people who know me are not too shocked and surprised

When suddenly I am old, and start to wear purple.

Holiday Shopping for the Four Personality Types

I know there are some of you who have not yet completed your shopping, and may be completely stumped about what to give your loved ones. Here's some great advice – make it all about them! Really watching and listening to the person you are buying for and making the gift something that is meaningful for them. We tend to choose gifts that we think may be meaningful to others – hence the new tradition of 're-gifting'. Each of the four personality styles has preferences. Check out the FUN tips below for giving the right gift.


Our very knowledgeable Green Personality Style will love any gift that furthers their knowledge and competence. Greens are not into possessions or 'things'. Avoid fluffy slippers, kitschy Christmas sweaters and gaudy jewellery. Knick knacks will find themselves in the next garage sale. Greens have a unique sense of humour, so tickets to a comedy show would work, as would a trip to an interesting place with lots of history. A magazine subscription to something that interests them, such as science, nature, how to go 'green'. Avoid packaging; it's likely that our Greens are totally serious about going 'Green'. Greens love ideas and concepts, a trip to the museum would be most welcome.

 The core need for our Gold Personality Style is belonging, tradition and responsibility. Think about practicality and how the gift will help the Gold personality type carry out their responsibilities or honour a family tradition. Do not be extravagant and ensure that the gift is of high quality they love trusted brand names. Some gift ideas - a planner for the New Year, a new briefcase to replace the old worn one, a labeller - Golds are very organized, or an alarm clock to ensure that the Gold is always on time. Gold personality types will appreciate that you put some thought behind the gift. As long as you are happy they are happy.

 Woo Hoo! The Orange Personality Style is motivated by freedom and impact. Don't fence me in! Just like Tigger - Oranges bounce. Orange Personality types are all about the senses. Think about gifts that relate to the senses, perfume, music, art work, fine wine or chocolate, a soft sweater. Oranges also like variety and fun, so look for something they can use in their leisure time. Plan a spa day and go with them - make sure there is lots of variety and choice. How about an adventure weekend like white water rafting or horseback riding? Even if you get it wrong, oranges won't care, they get over it easily - they'll just bounce back.

 Meaning and Significance - that's the key to a Blue Personality Style's heart. The Blue temperament has a core need for unique identity, meaning and significance. Their talents are as caregivers, facilitators and mentors. They value harmony and cooperation. People of the blue temperament will not really care about material things. You will really impress a blue if you wrote a poem about them, or, knit something special for them (even if it does look a bit wonky). Blues are often found in the Self Help section of the book store - careful though - they may already have all of them! Try a wall plaque that has a motivational saying, or a day out that pampers them, blues so often are caring for others. No matter what you give a blue, it will be treasured and appreciated. Blues are relationship centred; any gift that treasures your relationship with them will be welcomed.

What Personality Type is Santa Claus?

 Got your attention didn't I? If I were to guess what the Jolly Old Elf’s Type is I would say, INFJ. His NF makes him a blue temperament, meaning that his core needs are 'meaning and significance', and 'unique Identity'. Boy I'll say he's unique! – He’s the only person who can do what he does... He also gave Rudolf a special job because the other reindeer were picking on him – Typical Blue! Santa's I means that he's an Introvert he does spend 364 days at the North Pole! Introverts take their energy from inside – think of all the time he spends watching everyone. “You better watch out – you better not cry- you better not pout – I’m telling you why” – he even sees you when you’re sleeping! Santa's J means that he can be very organized. (Once a year he makes a list and checks it twice! He finds out who’s naughty and nice) His J will make him want to punish you with a lump of coal if you are ‘naughty’ – but since he is a Blue temperament – you will get a gift. Fellow type practitioners, what do you think? This is all for fun! Next Post – the Four Temperaments... what to buy for Christmas.

Is Your Cheese Old?

The parable in the little book "Who Moved My Cheese"  is all about how we react to change - or don't react to it - and what the consequences can be.

"Old Beliefs Do Not Lead You to New Cheese"

Does everything you do turn out the way you planned? Not likely... You can spend countless hours and money marketing and networking and maybe things are not percolating along the way you want. Ask yourself - am I making the same assumptions, am I doing the same things? or - am I sourcing out new cheese?

"Having Cheese Makes You Happy"

Of course it does - we all want success, we deserve it right? We worked hard! What happens when the cheese is gone? We ask - how did that happen? It's not fair! We tend to blame.

"The Quicker You Let Go Of Old Cheese, The Sooner You Find New Cheese."

Move on...that's right - get on with the adventure - step out of your comfort zone. When I try a new service or workshop out - sometimes it doesn't fly - so, I go back - turn it on its head and re-think. Usually, I end up on a completely different path from the one I intended, but that's OK - keep your eyes and ears open for new adventures, partnerships and opportunities. It will all work out.

"Move With The Cheese And Enjoy It!"

Sniff - out the situation and see change coming.
Scurry - get into and stay in action immediately.
Hem - don't be Hem - staying where you are will not work.
Haw - Haw did not believe in himself and followed Hem. Step out of your fear - be bold.

I hope this little parable will help you to Sniff and Scurry your way to success.

discoveryworkscoaching.com
ireneanderson.com

I Don't Wanna Grow Up!

What do I want to be when I grow up? I would be willing to bet that if you are over 50 you had not thought to ask yourself that question. Yet many Baby Boomers are finding themselves looking around for a second career. Canada has the biggest population of Boomers on the planet, many who have spent years in the corporate world with not a lot to show for their loyalty. Many are finding themselves with no pension, or an inadequate one.


Add to that the current financial situation, many cannot touch investments. So a second career for many is a necessity.

Boomers also for the most part are not ready to retire. No longer are they retiring from a job, but retiring to something else. So, where do you start? For most of us, we have adapted ourselves to the corporate world, and may have forgotten what we were really passionate about. Especially for women, with many roles - we look ahead and ask the question - who am I really?

Understanding your personality type can help you discover what activities or second career might fit you.

The Blue temperament type has a core need for meaning and significance and having a purpose in life. If there is no need for a second income, Blues will enjoy being involved with charity organizations, or painting, gardening, scrapbooking. For a second career consider, motivational speaking, coaching or consulting.


The Gold temperament type has a core need for belonging and duty. This type will likely have their finances in place. Golds will enjoy being involved with clubs, volunteer work where they will enjoy planning and organizing events. A second career for a Gold may be doing tax returns, bookkeeping, and accounting, helping others to organize their homes or offices.

The Orange temperament type has a core need for freedom and making an impact. If there is no need for an income, Oranges will enjoy playing a musical instrument, playing golf or pursue other outdoor pursuits. A second career for an Orange could be, motivational speaking, building furniture, adventure travelling and journalism.

The Green temperament type has core need for knowledge and competence. If no substitute income is required Greens will pursue intellectual pursuits, many may return to University or college just for the opportunity to learn. If work is a requirement consider consulting in the field that you are an expert in. Teach at a college, many will hire subject matter experts.

No matter what your personality type, explore the many options available to you - find the real you - the authentic you and work at or volunteer for something that gives you joy or passion. Boomers are living longer - you may as well have some fun!

Please... Don't Sell me Things!!

Please don't sell people on your product or service - sell them on what it can do for them, in other words what are the benefits? Let them ask about the features.


What turns you off as a buyer? I know what turns me off - people who are pushy and tell you that you really must have their widget, product or service. PLEASE! Cut it out... it does not work - you'll have people running for the hills! Here are some tips that apply to Personality Types, but in general whatever you are selling, make it about the client and what your product or service can do for them.

Don't sell me clothes! - If my Personality Style is Gold, tell me about how it will last, is it suitable for a business meeting. If I am Orange, tell about what a great impact I will make at the next PTA meeting.



Don't sell me a house! - If my Personality Style is Blue, sell me comfort, will my children or spouse like it - can I have friends over and have dinner parties and bar-b-ques? If I am a Green personality style - what's the carbon footprint, can I plant over the lawn? Is there room for my large collection of books?

This is just a taste of what psychology makes people buy, essentially, they will buy from YOU, and how you brand YOU. Sell your client on responsibility and belonging (GOLD), authenticity and people (BLUE), knowledge and competence (GREEN) and freedom and Impact (ORANGE).

How will you know their Style in person or over the 'phone - you won't, you will have to listen for clues and cues that tell you who you are dealing with.

Sell a solution to the client's immediate need or problem, and watch your sales numbers rise. Good luck on your journey to success!

Irene Anderson
Personal Leadership Coach

Making Sausages - The Big Shiny Dream

I am a real believer that your dreams give you real clues to what messages your brain is giving you – good or bad. I find that in times of stress (even when I don’t think I am stressed) I dream a lot – vivid involved dreams that are giving me clues about what to do next, what path to take.
I had a dream the other night that I started another business, making sausages – Wow! What a stretch that would be – for me uncharted territory!

Now, I love to cook – but making sausages from scratch is just not something I would do. In my dream, which was vivid and in full technicolour – I was involved in the process from start to finish (except the slaughter part – ick) – although the details were sketchy, I could visualize the process and saw and touched the end result – four beautiful organic sausages in a shiny, colourful plastic package. A work of Art!

And then I woke up – before I had to market and sell the product – thank goodness!

So what were the clues in this dream that could help me in my business? I know I had been struggling with focus and doing only one thing and doing it well. Not only that, I was getting myself involved in projects that were not necessarily serving my business. I believe the dream was telling me to re-focus, do what I am great at, and not get sidetracked with ‘shiny packaging’ or new ventures that, yes I could do well in but are not necessarily what my purpose is.

Our dreams can help us to focus on what’s really important, if you wake up after such a dream – try to write down what the dream was and later – ask yourself – what is my unconscious mind trying to tell me? This dream was telling me, align your goals and projects with your values (I love sausages, but I value human growth and potential more) – be focussed about your business – you cannot do it all. Although I encourage other women to tap into their super powers (best strengths), I can also share that we are only Superwoman when we are focussed on our strengths.

Hmm, I think I smell breakfast cooking...

I recommend “The Power of Focus”, by Jack Canfield, Mark Victor Hansen, Les Hewitt

A Favourite of Mine -Winnie The Pooh on Success

 Success does not come without planning, I love this take on goal setting from one of my favourite books.

Adapted from “Winnie the Pooh on Success” - Allen&Allen

Chinese Proverb – ‘There are many paths to the top of the mountain, but the view is always the same.”

Creating your Vision

Select a Dream
Use your dream to set a goal.
Create a Plan.
Consider resources.
Enhance Skills Abilities
Spend Time Wisely.
Start! – Get Organized and Go.

Goal Setting

All of us have Possibility power.
Choose your goals carefully – you are going to achieve them.
Have both long and short term goals. As you accomplish them, add new ones.
Imagine accomplishing really ambitious goals. – Reward yourself.
Engendering success requires concrete goals – be specific.
Value your long term goals; don’t get sidetracked by only working on short term goals.
Eliminate conflict between goals – harmonize and prioritize.

Create a Plan!
A list of things to do…

What has to be done
Who will do it?
When will it get done?

PRIORITIZE!

http://www.ireneanderson.ca/

Power Of Women United Book release

Power of Women United Book Launch June 17th 6:30 pm McNally Rand Don Mills, Toronto - Huge Networking Event -

The Power of Women United is a stunning presentation of
the hard lessons learned by women who have met the challenges
of life and succeeded. Each chapter is authored by a woman who
has traveled her own road and overcome unique struggles in her quest
to live a fulfilled and satisfying life. In their own words these women
project the emotional strength and wisdom they have gained, and shine
as beacons of light for those women searching for answers and their
own truth.
The diversity of situations presented touches the heart of every
reader and conveys the idea that they can be successful no matter their
past or current situation. Each author has stepped out of the shadow and
entered the business and entrepreneurial world and though they have
experienced different journeys, they have learned lessons that will give
strength and courage to those who dare to achieve their dreams.
The offering of personal knowledge gained from experience gives
the new and seasoned entrepreneur alike, confidence that the concepts
conveyed are of the utmost importance. These include specific ideas to
grow your business as well as motivational encouragement to help deal
with the fear that can keep you from excelling.
As women, we trust the wisdom of those who have gone before
us and dealt with the problems of balancing work and home life. Though
many are convinced that you can’t have it all, these women have proven
that not only can you succeed, you deserve to grasp the opportunity to
live your dream. The Power of Women United is the ultimate tool to begin
your own personal growth journey to be the woman you choose to be.

http://www.ireneanderson.ca/

“ I ain’t in a Slump – I’m just not Hitting!”

 One of my favourites, Yogi had a way of saying things that hit the nail on the head - in a funny kind of way. I would be willing to bet that every entrepreneur or self employed person has at least once a week - that nagging doubt - that voice that says "Am I doing the right thing?" Not just self employed people either - people in the corporate world especially in today's economy may not feel comfortable - with a proverbial axe over their heads. My day is Thursday - for some reason that's the day my gremlin shows up. It shows up as a nagging unease in the gut, and can if I let it stop me from getting up in the morning. So how do we stop this little guy or gal gremlin in it's tracks? Face up to him or her, acknowledge his or her existence and try to understand what message s/he is giving you - thank him/her for their input - say " Thanks for the advice" - and get moving. Just keep moving - do something - action works. If you are sitting at your desk and stumped for an idea, take a walk! Change the scenery. Self doubt is a real killer, it can kill your business and your confidence. Keep telling yourself how great you are - I mean it - it works! Believing in yourself is key to moving forward, if you don't believe in yourself no-one else will. As Yogi says "That's how I kept myself positive, by not getting all Negative." Ah - what great words of wisdom! Keep positive - your slump will disappear - keep believing in yourself. You are FANTASTIC!

Hitting The Wall

I  just listened to a podcast about transition and 'Hitting the Wall' - wow in that less than 2 minute blurb, a million thoughts started to go through my head. On another call last night my coach said “transition is ubiquitous’ – in other words life is always throwing stuff at us that pushes us into transition - nothing is static or same especially in these challenging times. I don’t know about you, but almost every friend or acquaintance I have has been touched by layoffs, downsizing, bankruptcy or just plain bad bosses, they now find themselves in middle age having to look for alternate employment - and in many cases settle for what we used to call McJobs.

A friend shared with me last night the plight of a group of long term employees who just heard that they have lost their jobs. Many have worked at this firm for over 25 years- that’s a lifetime with friends who have become family – that’s hard to give up, what a crushing blow. Many were escorted out of the building by security guards – how humiliating! I know how heartbroken they felt. I myself remember a similar closure at the same company where one of my team - a woman with over 25 years at this company left with her belongings in a green garbage bag. I will never forget that image; I will never forget the tears and the heartbreak.

What does this do for your confidence? Many will go through the normal stages of grief:

Denial – This didn’t happen - I can’t believe it!
Anger - It’s not fair – why me?
Bargaining – What if I can change this? Get my job back?
Depression – There may be lots of time on the couch in front of the TV
Acceptance – This is the stage where you finally realize that you cannot change the situation and this is where you will find the momentum to move on.

Many people ‘Hit the wall’ and never get back up. Over our many years of experience we collect so much training and wisdom, only to end up being marginalized or thought of as ‘past our Sell by Date’. What a shame, that our society sees wisdom and experience as ‘past it’. I myself have hit that wall on many occasions, and even now – hit the wall occasionally. So how do you manage to get up – brush yourself off and keep going?

The first step is taking back your confidence, learning and knowing that you are worthy and that you have an amazing gift to give the world. Every human being has this gift inside. The good news is that there is a road back – there is help along the way. The trick is to keep believing in yourself, even if you can only do it for one day a week, after a while, you will find yourself doing it more often. For me, coaching does it for me, whether it is one on one or in a group setting – talking things through with someone really helps.

So, what’s your wall?

- Lost your job?
- Stuck for a new idea?
- Business in a slump?
- In trouble at work?
- Single Mom struggling with bills?
- Stay at home mom feeling isolated?

Inside this gift of TRANSITION, there is an opportunity just waiting to be uncovered. It is a new beginning waiting to be unwrapped, with a voyage of adventure and challenge on the other side.

Accept your gift – it’s yours for the taking!

Who's sailing with you on your journey?

My mother always told me to watch the company I kept – of course what did she know? Seems she knew quite a lot. Whether we like it or not we are influenced by the people we hang around with, and others judge us by the company we keep.
There is an old exercise that has you choose who you would have in your lifeboat if you were cast adrift, your compass out of whack – your oars overboard. This is such a useful exercise to use when you are at your lowest ebb (pardon the pun) and need to draw upon the people who most influence and support you in a positive way.
This is a great journal exercise – come back to it again and again to see if you choose the same people – you must choose 9 people – here are the rules:

First, the people you select to accompany you in your lifeboat must be individuals you really want to be there. Adding family members because you think you should, could sink your boat.
Second, the nine people chosen can be alive or dead, however you must have known them personally – William Shakespeare doesn’t count – come on… no way you could have known him!

Make your list of people who you really count on:
- Who is there with a shoulder to cry on?
- Who helps you out when you are too sick to drive the kids to school?
- Who congratulates you on the terrific job you are doing?
- Who tells you like it is when you are being self indulgent?
- Who looks for opportunities to help you build your business or career?

You get the picture – come back to this list every time you need to know who your loyal fans are, who gets you – who you can count on.
Have some fun with this, draw pictures, write a story about how you finally survive. Bon Voyage! May the Winds speed you on your journey!

Looking for daily inspiration at an affordable cost?

mylifecompass.com/ireneA

Yes, a coach is available 24/7!

G.R.O.W

Ever feel that if you had a coach at your disposal 24/7 that you could accomplish so much more in your life? Well, you do - and it's you! Yes, you can benefit from some very simple methods to get your off the couch - outta your funk and into ACTION! Use the G.R.O.W model to get you going...

G - What is your goal? Even if it's a goal you have for the day - write it down, ask yourself these questions:
- How will I know that I have achieved the goal?
- What specific actions can I take to achieve the goal?

R - What is my current reality? What if anything is preventing me from reaching my goal? Questions to ask yourself:

- What am I doing now?
- What is the result of that?

O - Explore your options - brainstorm with yourself, make lists of ideas. Ask Yourself?

- What else can I do?
- What of this or that constraint were removed?
- What are the benefits of each option?

W - The way forward, or the will to move ahead. Make a commitment to yourself, ask yourself:

- What will I do and by when?
- How will this option help me to succeed?
- What else will I commit to do to reach my goal.

Simple, but it works - I challenge you to try it and share your results with me. or..

contact me for a sample coaching session..


Need more help? Try out Compass Coaching - get daily coaching for a very affordable rate

www.mylifecompass.com/ireneA